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And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that itapos;ll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
But I donapos;t

When you say that itapos;s gonna be,
It always turns out to be a different way,
I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...

[Chorus:]

I donapos;t know how to feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I donapos;t know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day

Itapos;s always been up to you,
Itapos;s turning around,
Itapos;s up to me,
Iapos;m gonna do what I have to do,
just do

Gimme a lil time,
Leave me alone a little while,
Maybe itapos;s not too late,
not today, today, today, today, today...

[Chorus:]

I donapos;t know how to feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I donapos;t know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day

And I know Iapos;m not ready,
Maybe tomorrow

And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that itapos;ll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...

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My life feels like itapos;s falling apart.� Iapos;m not quite sure if itapos;s a good thing.� So many books preach about letting go, and releasing your burdens... But I feel a loss of purpose when I try to�do so deliberately.� My ambitions and goals tend to fall away with my burdens.�� My life seems to stagnate from that point on.�� Depressing just writing about it.�� I know the way I let go is wrong, or at least, not correct in the way I go about it.�� But Iapos;ve felt that absolute clarity and bright feeling of being alive that can come from letting go.��Itapos;s�just�getting to that point thatapos;s difficult.

Difficult?� Maybe terrifying is more accurate.� I feel like a newly hatched chick waiting at the edge of a cliff side.� If I jump will these flimsy appendages hold me up?� Will I drop like a stone?� What if I�soar higher than I should?� How high should I go?� What if I skim too close to the ground?� What If I fly?

Quantum physics has finally won me.� Questions are now more calming than answers.� Maybe because�Iapos;m�not stagnating further than I already have?� Or maybe because it distracts from the constant looming, pressuring opinions that I seem to collect.� What are you doing with your life?� Are you doing something worthwhile?� Are you going to college?� Are you happy?� Are you perfect?� Can you pat head and rub you belly while you say your abcapos;s?

The most idiotic thing about myself?� My need to please people, myself included.� Iapos;m a bit of a�perfectionist as well.� Thank god I was raised in an artsy, hippie town.� Iapos;m too laconic and cheerful to be a total idiot.�
The best thing about myself?� My ability to laugh at me-self and life in general.�

Maybe the road to happiness is lined with whoopee cushions?� Who knows?

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I wish the gym was open this late, this is the time of day that I feel motivated to go.


Also Iapos;m watching Bamapos;s Unholy Union, and I want to feel all bitter and snarky about him and his wife being all lovey and kissy, but itapos;s just so cute to see how in love he is with her.

Wish I could find a job I wanted to do that was reliable and payed enough for me to move back out on my own.

Well back to cranking out some art.

Oh and one last thing. I wish I was awesome and famous, because having Iggy Pop and the Stooges come out of a 33 year retirement to play your wedding is TEH AWESOME
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Monday 10/13

Review for perfect competition/cost test

Tuesday 10/14

Perfect competition/cost test

Wednesday 10/15

PSAT day.

Thursday 10/16

Notes on monopoly. We were able to get up to the profit determination point on Thursday. We will finish these notes on Monday 10/20. Homework was activity 32.

Friday 10/17

Went over activity 32 to begin class. Everyone received a copy of p. 200, the Lang Monopoly, and we went over that as a group. Handout p. 204 was then given out and we discussed the elastic vs. The inelastic portion of the demand curve and how total revenue is affected. Activity 33 from the workbook is for homework, due on Monday.

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[If it were just the dimension-switching itself, it would be a lot easier for Fubuki to take it in her stride. She went to Dark World, after all, so the idea of other universes doesnapos;t much phase her. What does though is that this time, she was in the middle of talking to her master when it happened. She hisses to herself. First sheapos;ll find out where she is, and then she can work on getting home.]

[ooc: Sheapos;s from Sparkyapos;s world, but from near the end of season 4, and Darknessapos; servant.]
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Iapos;m tired but I donapos;t want to go to bed, I did want to watch my new iron man dvd, but that is so not happening tonight. I hate having a cold, it makes me sleepy and grumpy, and my head hurts and I canapos;t breathe through my nose which is really annoying. Throat hurts too.
I think I will sleep soon and just wake up early and watch Iron Man then before i go to school, I always wake up early anyway so that I can wash my hair and let it dry on its own before I leave (I hate hair dryers).
I wish that I had kept up with my school work more in the beginning of the year because now I have alot of catching up to do. Starting with reading the first half of my education psych text this weekend because i have a midterm on Monday for which I am woefully unprepared.
Iapos;ve been really sad and depressed this term, it was weird. But hey talked to some people and Iapos;m kind of better now, besides ranting on here seems to help too. My friends read about it if they want to and anyone else who stumbles upon this is unlikely to know who I am... Sooo pfft.
Tomorrow will not be much fun, class, then visiting my assigned school, then eat then work home by maybe like 10ish... Sometimes I really dislike the bus system...

Yep, this definitely made me feel better, Iapos;m all mellow and squishy now...

Why yes, my brain does work in mysterious ways...
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